Last night, whilst in a social blur of cider and good company, Nik confided a shocking revelation to me – in the two year period of a past relationship she had not once had an orgasm! I couldn’t believe my ears, how can this be? How can you not realise that something is fundamentally wrong. Probing a little deeper I discovered that she had once faked it but this brought up a much bigger question – how on earth did he, the man that was apparently as lacking in the bedroom as her orgasm’s were, not realise that something was wrong?! Surely he couldn’t think he was doing a good job, that was in fact fulfilling Nik’s every desire? It could be considered that, due to her lack of climax, he thought that he was doing ok….perhaps even quite well, but to fake once, and then never have it happen again….I’m a bit gobsmacked that he did not do anything to rectify this situation! 

It occurs to me now that perhaps we stay in relationships far too long than we really should. I know that sex is not the be and end all of everything, far from it, the one long term relationship I had was based on sex (along with a complete lack in other area’s of any kind of interest) and I’m saying now, that did not work out well. But I know that in this particular relationship there was also a lack of emotional support and giving from Nik’s partner so why, in spite of all these issues did she choose to persevere? Why, when our head is screaming to leave, does our heart make us stay?